|
Home
 How to secure your home
Home sweet home
Space utilization and storage
Vastushastra
Study
areas for children
Clutter
control
Economic
decoration
Child
safety
Fire
prevention
Hygiene
Family and Kids
Homeopathic
Remedies
Family Love
Put
the kids to bed
Create quality time with your
kids
Protecting
kids online
Health Tips and Remedies
What
your kids want in a parent?
Chidren
who hate school
Parenting
is teamwork
Parents
fighting
Home-Schooling |
 One
scary thing about parenting is it's a temporary job. Our active parenting
days are numbered and we need to count them. How many parenting days do you
still have?
If your youngest child is five years old, you can assume he
will be leaving the nest at around age eighteen, so that gives you thirteen
years or 156 months or 4,745 days! Since we all know how fast the days zip by,
before you know it your job as a resident parent will be over. That knowledge
should motivate all to take a parenting check-up.
So how are you doing as a parent?
Often we concentrate on our children's behavior and not on
our own. Why not look at your behavior from your child's perspective? In a
survey of 100,000
children, children were asked what they wanted most in their parents. Check out
the top ten answers and evaluate how you are doing in each area:
-
Children want parents who don't argue in front of them.
Children tend to do what parents do, not necessarily what they say. How do you
handle differences? Can you disagree and share your negative feelings without
attacking the other person or defending yourself? Then your children will also
learn how to process anger and resolve conflict in positive ways.
-
Children want parents who treat each family member the
same. Treating your children the same does not mean treating them equal.
Each child is unique and but each needs the same love and understanding.
Evaluate your relationship with each child.
-
Parents who are honest. The parent who says, "Tell
the tele-marketer (who is on the phone) I'm not here," may not realize what he
is modeling to his child. Do you say what you mean and mean what you say?
-
Parents who are tolerant of others. When parents are
tolerant of others, children learn to be patient with those who are different
from them. In what ways have you modeled tolerance to your children?
-
Parents who welcome their friends to the home. If
the gang is ganging up at your house, then you will know where your own
children are! Cultivate an open-home policy and get to know their friends.
-
Parents who build a team spirit with their children.
As children move into the adolescent years, parents who cultivate a team
spirit will have a greater influence on their children. How can you foster
teamship in your family?
-
Parents who answer their questions. Have you been
guilty of saying, "I'm busy right now. Let's talk about this later." Then
later never happens. Take time today to answer your children's questions and
when you don't know the answer, admit it and offer to help find the answer.
-
Parents who discipline them when needed, but not in
front of others, especially their friends. Amazingly, children really do
want limits, but don't count on them volunteering that information!
-
Parents who concentrate on good points instead of weak
ones. Look at your child as an incomplete jigsaw puzzle and concentrate on
the beautiful developing picture instead of the missing pieces. Make a list of
your child's strengths and look for appropriate times to point them out.
-
Parents who are consistent. We were not always
consistent but we consistently strove to be. Be encouraged. The occasional
inconsistency will not ruin your children. But your children need to know that
your love and limits are consistent. With boundaries comes security. Is there
an area in which you need to work on being more consistent?
How do you rate? We hope you picked up some tips that
will keep you from being a behavior problem to your children. And that from time
to time you will take a parenting check up and wisely number
your days.
|